Gifts
The last week I have been blessed to be given a great number of gifts! Gifts came in all colors, sizes and shapes. There were gifts of words, wit and wonder. Gifts of laughter in an elevator and the gift of honesty. Several gifts of time were given to me by unlikely gift givers. The Kuwaiti government gave us all two extra days to celebrate Kuwait Independence Weekend! A three day weekend suddenly became a five day weekend. When found time arrives I smile. Time is precious. For far to long I haven’t been as mindful of time as perhaps I should be. I am looking forward to choosing how the gifts of time will be spent!
From the random and unexpected strawberries at the door to the gift of true friendship, a gift that never stops giving, there are moments where the simple beauty of those in my community just amaze me. It has been said,” The conscious brain can only hold one thought at a time. Choose a positive thought.” The same is true with your heart. Love can’t live in the same heart as hate. I like that I am surrounded by people who get that and remind me to keep giving!
the lululemon manifesto
- Drink FRESH water and as much water as you can. Water flushes unwanted toxins from your body and keeps your brain sharp.
- A daily hit of athletic-induced endorphins gives you the power to make better decisions, helps you be at peace with yourself, and offsets stress.
- Do one thing a day that scares you.
- Listen, listen, listen, and then ask strategic questions.
- Write down your short and long-term GOALS four times a year. Two personal, two business and two health goals for the next 1, 5 and 10 years. Goal setting triggers your subconscious computer.
- Life is full of setbacks. Success is determined by how you handle setbacks.
- Your outlook on life is a direct reflection of how much you like yourself.
- That which matters the most should never give way to that which matters the least.
- Stress is related to 99% of all illness.
- Jealousy works the opposite way you want it to.
- The world is changing at such a rapid rate that waiting to implement changes will leave you 2 steps behind. DO IT NOW, DO IT NOW, DO IT NOW!
- Friends are more important than money.
- Breathe deeply and appreciate the moment. Living in the moment could be the meaning of life.
- Take various vitamins. You never know what small mineral can eliminate the bottleneck to everlasting health.
- Don’t trust that an old age pension will be sufficient.
- Visualize your eventual demise. It can have an amazing effect on how you live for the moment.
- The conscious brain can only hold one thought at a time. Choose a positive thought.
- Live near the ocean and inhale the pure salt air that flows over the water, Vancouver will do nicely.
- Observe a plant before and after watering and relate these benefits to your body and brain.
- Practice yoga so you can remain active in physical sports as you age.
- Dance, sing, floss and travel.
- Children are the orgasm of life. Just like you did not know what an orgasm was before you had one, nature does not let you know how great children are until you have them.
- Successful people replace the words “wish”, “should” and “try” with “I will”.
- Creativity is maximized when you’re living in the moment.
- Nature wants us to be mediocre because we have a greater chance to survive and reproduce. Mediocre is as close to the bottom as it is to the top, and will give you a lousy life.
- lululemon athletica creates components for people to live longer, healthier and more fun lives. If we can produce products to keep people active and stress-free, we believe the world will become a much better place.
- Do not use cleaning chemicals on your kitchen counters. Someone will inevitably make a sandwich on your counter.
- SWEAT once a day to regenerate your skin.
- Communication is COMPLICATED. We are all raised in a different family with slightly different definitions of every word. An agreement is an agreement only if each party knows the conditions for satisfaction and a time is set for satisfaction to occur.
- What we do to the earth we do to ourselves.
- The pursuit of happiness is the source of all unhappiness.
Pride, Passion and Protect
It is Saturday morning. A perfect time to post! I woke up this morning and the letter P, must have been popping in and out of my dreams because I was pleased to be inspired this morning. I have started writing a book and the words come from all kinds of places. They peak around corners and suddenly pop into my life. They are placed on postcards. The words arrive but have managed to find away to keep themselves in proper perspective. All the good letters and words know to be supportive and focused on us getting published!
I feel it has made the blog have a little less pop because the wit, words and wisdom are living in another place for a while. I’m okay with that because the important things need to be protected. Protected from games and people. Not because of pride or prejudice or even to make any sort of point. It isn’t personal. Protection is important for a sense of peace. Nobody’s perfect but people who understand peace and peace of mind get what you do to protect yourself. They don’t push or pull they just are polite.
Not to long ago I would have pushed to make this post about travel or traveling. There are a lot of ways that the letter P can tie into travel. From packing to parking. Planning to pit-stops. Passports to airports. Watching passion and pure joy as people experience the thrill of winning or the pleasure of a perfect party is one of the perks of travel. The letter P puts in more than an appearance at a party. They don’t put on a show they just enjoy the power of play not power plays. Whether perfect in pink or playing and performing on stage the letter P practices so they know how to gentle rock your world.
Hope you have a day filled with peace, pleasure and parties or whatever you find pleasing to do on a Saturday.
Fascinated by What Frustrates You!
Now the next word is fascination.
Be fascinated with life and people and drama that is live and in color every day.
Cinemascope.
Fascination goes a little bit beyond interest.
Interested people want to know does it work.
Fascinated people want to know how does it work.
To be fascinated instead of frustrated.
It is just a little trick to play.
The next time you’re tempted to be frustrated, see if you can’t turn it into fascination.
Instead of a frown, it puts a smile on your face. Now sometimes you look a little weird, but so be it.
He says, “How can he smile?”
I don’t know.
He must be somebody different.
It is early Friday morning. The best time to write. This quote came into my life and it has inspired several thoughts. There is so much in Kuwait that you could get frustrated with. So much to learn, to try and understand. You could spend your days being frustrated with people, situations, the weather or traffic but wouldn’t it be more enjoyable to instead be fascinated by things. The things that fascinate me about Kuwait. Now there is the start of an article…
My other random question for the morning is do you start to write on the new idea, the inspiration that came to you, or do you finish up projects that are under-construction. If you think about it the only way things get done is when construction continues. Perhaps I need a system for this and perhaps it is a question best asked to my fellow writers of the world.
So on that note, good morning sunshines. I am glad we fascinate instead of frustrate each other. Thanks for the attention!
The Rules?
Monopoly has rules! Euchre has rules and so to does the Game of Life, the real one not the board game. So what are the rules? Does someone else define the rules? Should you define your own rules? Recently someone told me I wasn’t playing by the rules or at least his rules. There is a book that I have been told should be purchased so that woman should follow the dating rules! At school there are rules, in business there are rules. From chain of command to using your air miles on flights rules are everywhere. Rules have reasons. From the time a meeting should start to the time a meeting should end. Rules are important. Rules keep order. There are lots of rules. From the rules of the road, which often aren’t followed in Kuwait, to the rules of the heart, which come to think of it sadly aren’t followed in Kuwait either. Rules keep you safe and depending on whose rules you follow you can sleep peacefully at night.
Surprises…
“Surprise is a brief emotional state that is the result of experiencing an unexpected
relevant event. Surprise can be neutral, pleasant, or unpleasant.
Accordingly, some would not categorize surprise in itself as an emotion.”
-Wikipedia-
Life is filled with surprises, good and bad. When you were young each day was kind of a surprise. Everything was new. As you get older, and wiser you start to think about your career path and goals. The surprises in your life are different.
Sometimes people look for little ways to amuse themselves. Like a little boy playing with his toys, the surprises are simple and silly. Other times wise men who are ready to lead look for ways to inspire all the people around them. The simple and silly is important but it is also important to know when the surprises need to be about reaching big goals and dreams. When the surprises need to be about being selfless and helping other people reach big goals and dreams.
Today I came home to find surprises on my door step. Nothing big in size but grand in gesture. A thoughtful and practical gift for the art room. It is nice when the surprises aren’t about me but instead about the art. It is great to be a part of a community that consistently supports the arts. That support isn’t surprising because it is just a constant. Just the way we roll!
I like the surprises that are about kindness, communication and that lead to an evening of dancing. Sometimes the best surprises don’t come from other people. They appear when you do something that you didn’t think was possible, you try something you have never done before or you say something that needed to be said. It is fun to surprise yourself.
I hope today you have a day filled with good, kind and wonderful surprises. I hope you surprise someone else and yourself!
The Letter T!
The letter ” T ” tenaciously followed me around, stood behind me and walked with me! I forgot it in an email I wrote, it got painted in my classroom and when times got challenging it reminded me to try. I drank tea, as the little boy I now tutor and I talked about the and bugs. From talking to toasting Thursday was all about enjoying where the letter “T” would pop up next.
I am reading Steven King’s book, “On Writing” a Memoir of the Craft. He talks a lot about where he gets his ideas. Like fossils in the ground he finds them and then determines, from these pieces of fossils, if he can put together the bones of a story. I get my ideas from people. From talking and time, from watching and listening. I am surrounded by such creative people so ideas seem to be everywhere these days.
There are lots of times where I have to protect the writer and the words, where I have to protect myself. So I walk away from the big loud voices. To sit with the calm and quiet. The big loud voices are fading into the background, almost getting lost in the backyard. I don’t hear them say good morning anymore. They might yell,” We should do this again sometime.” but eventually they will stop shouting.
There were all these ideas floating around in my head last night. Actually there have been lots of stories floating around in my head. It was a mistake not to write them all down, but I was tired and perhaps my head a little swelled as I made the transition from place to place. Learning new things and new systems takes time to embrace. I am very clear in my head of both the things I want to embrace with grace. However, I am less clear about the things I need to un-embrace or let go. I have been working on this piece of writing, forcing a take-away line, something the reader will remember. I can’t figure out what the overall message is so I need to walk away until it becomes clear.
There is boldness in beginning. When I decided to start writing more often I got business cards, then to keep me going I built a writing room in my apartment. As I get published I need to thank those that inspire. I need thank-you cards, for there isn’t just one to thank, there are many. It is nice when you passion pays but I truly believe it also pays to be passionate.
It is Friday now, book club is coming today to talk about the Lemon Tree and then my list of things to do takes shape.
I hope the letters in your day are kind!
Good Stories and Interesting Words
I’ve been wrapped up in writing this new story. Not a travel story and not quite a people story but an interesting story. This story has made me think, made me laugh out loud, made me grumpy and made me grow. It is very, very interesting how this one story has had a life of its own. In fact it makes me think that the story behind the story is almost more interesting than the story itself!
It has a few more stages to go through but it is nice that this story has reached a new stage. Why now that I think about the next phases the story has to go through I do believe that the story behind the story is more interesting than the story itself.
Energy!
Every country, city, town and adventure I have been on has had its own special energy. Some places make you want to dance. Other places inspire you to go on long walks on the beach or spend hours laughing at cafes. I don’t know if I can describe the energy of Kuwait. I’ll have to think on that one a little more.
When traveling you meet people who have different energies. At times people give you energy and at times they take energy. Putting someone in your life, even for a short amount a time, means that on some level you have chosen to give them the gift of your energy. Even when you aren’t with them they cross your mind. That act of letting them be important, if only in your thoughts, still takes energy. You never know who is thinking about you. What they are thinking about you and what energy and light people are sending to you. The flip side of that is you never know who you are taking energy away from.
Like a city that never sleeps energy isn’t static. It shifts, it changes and it grows. I am more careful of the countries I travel to these days. I am also more careful of the energy around me. Who gives to you and who takes away from you? Interesting questions on a day filled with so much fun and energy.
When You First Wake-Up!
When you first wake-up, in the morning, after a nap or in the middle of the night there is a quiet energy around you. A calm and peacefulness that if you carefully press into this moment you are able to write with clarity and truth. In these moments your inner critic is not awake. Writing or any art for that matter is a very self-involved task. Spending hours with your thoughts, your ideas, your words, your paint, your music is an act that by nature shuts other people out and forces you to focus inward.
The process of creating does not have to be isolating. Artist who publish and sell their works share their gifts for money but often giving words or paintings as gifts to friends is another way to involve them in your world. To let them know you care. Friends, family and loved ones who take the time to listen to your story ideas, help you edit are truly precious to an artist. Writer’s groups provide a community of reciprocal support. Their feedback is very valuable and a good writer’s group should be protected and gentle cared for. However, friends, family, your loved ones, are just happy to support you, to give you the gift of their time, those are the people you know care on a different level.
I also find when I first wake-up I am very humble, very hopeful. Like as I rested a quiet calm spread over me like a warm blanket; the ego went to sleep and hasn’t woke-up to remember all the bold, brash and boastful that I did or had done to me. The human mind amazes me. When you first wake-up you remember what is truly important, without your ego getting involved; able to appreciate people for the strength, their gifts and how we are all put on this earth to learn and grow. Remembering how to truly share. If you work hard you can stay that humble and hopeful all day long.
A musician must make music, an artist must paint, a poet must write, if he is to be ultimately at peace with himself.
What one can be, one must be.
-Abraham Maslow-
Art attracts us only by what it reveals of our most secret self.
Jean-Luc Godard
There Has Been
There has been a lot of music in my life the last couple of weeks. The wonder of Christmas Music. The great iTunes gift from my parents. The mass amounts of downloaded Bon Jovi. Tonight there was no music. I wrote without music. Suddenly the sound of silence was actually a sound. What I mean is after there was so much music, when the music stopped the silence had a sound. A quiet gentle whisper. A sound that will always travel with me. No batteries, no power cord, no lap top required. Just a quiet gentle whisper. What a beautiful sound.
What is your word for 2010?
As a wordsmith. I used to have words of the months. Big words, fun words and little words to help me focus on what was truly important. From no to yes, water sports, friendship, play, boundaries, grace, communication, mindfulness; there were lots of words. This year there will be lots of wonderful words along the way but I have decided that I need two over arching themes. Two big bad, wicked, wild words that all the other little words follow. That set the pace, the tone that the other words to follow.
If I step back and look, really look at last years words they were all words that built up to these two. The 2010 words of the year are:
Love: This comes first because to be disciplined you need love. Parents love their children but they show that love by reminding them to brush their teeth, to go to bed on time and eat their vegetables. Love is everywhere. At the same time true love hides in special places. I am tired of hiding what I really love. To make room in your life for all that you love, you need the second word of the year. They work in partnership. Hand in hand.
Discipline: A strong word, for strong people. This word just doesn’t happen over night. It is a word that is worth spending a year, a lifetime to make it part of you. What you do everyday defines you. How you do it also defines you. You need discipline to say no. You also need to be disciplined to say yes to the things you really want. It is a noble quest to go after what you really want. Both discipline and love eat fear for breakfast! They also both help define what you eat for breakfast!
Discipline and love bring about surprises, interesting things and adventure. I look forward to seeing how I use these beautiful words and what they will bring for 2010!
What are your words for the year?
“Disciplined people, doing disciplined things, in disciplined ways.”
“Good To Great” by Jim Collins
I love to write!
I wake-up in the morning and I want to write. Before I go to sleep I write. I have never realized it before it just kind of happened organically but I need to write. www.eHow.com gives you information from how to write a book to how to get more TV channels. On this site it also lists how people write to provoke change, to express themselves, to educate or to gain notoriety. For along time I had no idea why I wrote but now I know. I write to connect. To connect ideas to emotion. To connect people to thoughts. To connect people to products. It doesn’t change how I write now that I know why. Just gives me a deeper sense of understanding.
I once saw the author Sark speak. She talked about how she wrote an entire book in bed! I am blessed by the fact that I don’t feel there is one space, one country, one restaurant that I have to be in order to write. I write everywhere. From comfortable coffee shop chairs, with good friends, to writing while “camping” at the Hilton. Sure as of late a lot of blog posts and articles have come while writing in my apartment but I still enjoy myself wherever I write.
I have started networking with other writers. Which has been an amazing process. There are a few Kuwait bloggers that I would love to meet in person but one step a time. I am on the write path and I love it!
New?!?
I have moved to a new location, in the Great State of Kuwait, for more vacation goodness. This new location has given me a new set of eyes to see Kuwait and also given me new ideas, new energy to old ideas and some new understandings. I sometimes wish I had a brain like a computer that kept things in organized and logical files. How cool would it be to be able to compartmentalize like a computer? To be able to only call up and act on data when requested or needed, however, truth be told, I am still working on an effective filing systems. This break I have de-cluttered and deleted a lot of things. Having less lets you focus on the files that need the most attention. I really used to believe that a clean house, a clean desk is the sign of a miss-spent life but there is a simple beauty in having less.
I love seeing people’s creative side. Nobody should need to apologize for the sparks of passion that at times short wire a hard drive. If my brain were a computer there would be beautiful and multi-colored paint all over my files. The files would have flowers and those fruity drink umbrellas sticking out of it. Sure as a computer some peoples minds might need to be unexplainably shut down, then cool off before properly recharging but it is this new or recharged space where the beautiful ideas are first, seen and then developed. Turning things off gives you a new energy when you turn them on again.
Regardless of which way you think you need to find a way to celebrate your successes and play up your personal strengths. I walked along Gulf Road this morning. Waking up to a true water view, sitting quietly and enjoying tea on the terrace reminded me that no matter how you think, you file or organize when you actually see the person who is behind the screen how they think is not nearly as important as what they think.
I also brought my cute but broken and still under warrantee camera to X-cite Alghanim Electronics, here is hoping that Alghanim finds a way to quickly make my camera as good as new.
#ThreeWordsForYou
It is late in Kuwait. I can’t sleep. I have a cold. For some strange reason I logged onto my Twitter account. Words are important and Twitter is filled with words, details and useful facts. Unlike your life, Twitter, changes and trends like the wind. One minute something is hot on Twitter, the next it is not. The Twitter community is surprisingly unpredictable. When will updates come? What will be the latest trend? Nobody knows. It is part of what draws people to Twitter, to see the latest news.
The trend that captured my imagination this early morning is #ThreeWordsForYou! According to www.whatthetrend.com a
“YOUNG COMEDIAN BORN IN JACKSONVILLE.FL @AJ904 IS ASKING EVERYONE TO TWEET
3 words you could say to someone, usually an insult.”
People across the planet are writing there 3 words. Sure, it started with barbs, jabs and attacks. A steady stream of little insults, however, like you walk away from people who repeatedly poke you with sharp words, the trend of hateful words has started to get washed away with compassion, kindness and gentle wave of Twitter goodness.
From three words like, “Keep your faith” or “You are beautiful” or “Ask for help.” and the always classic and popular in any language, ” I love you!” the three word trend has the power and possibility to be quite amazing. However, beauty and wonder doesn’t grow in isolation. It needs encouragement, support and a sense of hope. The Twitter trend of #ThreeWordsForYou is starting to develop. With sports references, political references and classic television lines changing the trend. In the spirit of softening vocabulary I have decided to add a series of #ThreeWordsForYouAboutTravel
#ThreeWordsForYouAboutTravel
Enjoy your country.
Enjoy the country.
Plan your route.
Drive very carefully.
Ask for directions.
Ride an elephant.
Cross the bridge.
Touch a stone.
Taste the snow.
Smell the cookies.
Find your adventure.
Talk to people.
Try new things.
Feel the wind.
Watch the sunset.
Embrace a sunrise.
Eat with friends.
Hug a stranger.
Love your family.
Celebrate new beginnings
Relish coming home.
Travel with grace.
Stars
Jim Morriosn once said, “I see myself as a huge fiery comet, a shooting star. Everyone stops, points up and gasps, “Oh look at that!” Then- whoosh, and I’m gone…and they’ll never see anything like it ever again… and they won’t be able to forget me- ever.” Shooting stars are beautiful and rare but why we make wishes on shooting stars confuses me. Why wish, why idolize something that is gone in an instant? That flashes across the night sky never to be seen again- making you wonder if you ever really saw it in the first place?
The English Language nursery rhyme,
Starlight, star bright,
The first star I see tonight;
I wish I may, I wish I might,
Have the wish I wish tonight.
Celebrates why wishes are important. Wishes are things that change, grow and develop over time. Wishes are something you want to keep in your life, in your heart everyday. In Canada you could look up each night and usually always find the North Star. A dependable beacon of light, when lost the North Star has helped people find their way home. Why search for a shooting star to help remind you of the importance of having hope? The North Star will bring you home and at the end of the day we all just want to feel safe at home, where ever that is.
Stars are important in Arabic culture. One of the many different Arabic dialects spoken in Kuwait is Farsi. In the dialect of Farsi, Shahab, translated means, “a shooting star.” A boy named Shahab is bright, sparkly and heading for success. One hopes the man turns out to be just as strong.
Shooting stars come and go so quickly. With the haze in night sky in Kuwait I think I need to hope to see a bright star or something that I think is called a Sate’a Najmah.
It hasn’t rained yet today, which often clears up the desert haze, so tonight if you see a strong shining star can you make a Christmas wish for me?
Dyed-in-the-Wool
The expression “dyed in the wool” refers to a state of steadfastness, especially with respect to one’s political, religious or social beliefs. The expression comes from the fact that fabric can be dyed in a number of ways. The woven fabric may be dyed after it is complete, or the threads may be dyed before they are woven. When a color is “dyed in the wool,” the wool itself is dyed before being spun into threads, so the colour is least likely to fade or change.
-Wiktionary. N., a wiki-based open content dictionary-
Words weave in and out of the fabric of your life. If you aren’t careful the words you use and hear every day can gently start to shape how you see yourself. When I worked in an inner city school students had such a hateful vocabulary because there ears had been filled with nothing but hate and turmoil since the day they were born. Slowly, gently and with soothing tones and constant love they started to see that they deserved something more. Being surrounded by sadness for so long it was often painful and confusing for them to understand how to hold onto someone who was prepared to love them regardless of how they acted.
The phrase dyed-in-the-wool appeals to my artistic side. Dying wool isn’t a quick process, it isn’t without mess but when done the color is strong. Like learning a new walk, embracing a new culture or belief there will be moments of mess but if you are a dyed-in-the-wool optimist you know the end product will turn out to be a thing of beauty. Often good phrases inspire good questions or, if you prefer the term, essential questions. So what are your dyed-in-the-wool beliefs? What is dyed-in-the-wool true about your personality?
At a Christmas dinner party tonight we talked about how your dyed-in-the-wool personality traits shaped your dyed-in-the-wool habits. One person explained that they were always a helping soul by nature. So it seemed only natural that there hobby was then taking care of animals. Someone who naturally likes to bring people together or help other connect is naturally has writing as a dyed-in-the-wool hobby.
The challenge is when people’s dyed-in-the-wool habits are harmful. A gossip can’t be trusted and over time your friends get that about you, they learn ” Tell-a-phone, tell-a-graph, tell-a-Sandra.” They know when Sandra is in the room that the conversation needs to be about her life and nothing more. With love and light one day Sandra will hopefully learn how to use her dyed-in-the-wool habits to spread news and information about events, not gossip. Just like a dyed-in-the-wool people pleasers who always has a need to bring people joy. With help they will come to the self understanding that that they first need to bring themselves happiness.
I work with pre-teenagers now. As I start Christmas break I can’t help but reflect back on all that I learned this school year. Sometimes you have to think long and hard about things and other times you just know. Helping students channel their dyed-in-the-wool personalities requires a team effort but watching a young person grow and refine with gentle polish is truly my pleasure.
Apple tea!
Gone to drink apple tea! Happy Eid!
Side Effects!?!?
In computer science, a function or expression is said to have a side effect if, in addition to producing a value, it also modifies some state or has an observable interaction with calling functions or the outside world. For example, a function might modify a global or a static variable, modify one of its arguments, raise an exception, write data to a display or file, read data, call other side-effecting functions, or launch missiles. In the presence of side effects, a program’s behavior depends on history; that is, the order of evaluation matters. Because understanding an effectful program requires thinking about all possible histories, side effects often make a program harder to understand.
Side effects are essential to enable a program to interact with the outside world (people, filesystems, other computers on networks). But the degree to which side effects are used depends on the programming paradigm. Imperative programming is known for uncontrolled, promiscuous use of side effects. In functional programming, side effects are rarely used. Functional languages such as Standard ML and Scheme do not restrict side effects, but it is customary for programmers to avoid them.
I am thinking in a very non-linear way today. It could be because my sight lines have changed in the last few days. I have started to view the world from a whole different angle. It could just be because it is Thursday and I don’t usually write on a Thursday. Whatever the reason I have started to think about the concept of side effects today. Not the, “unintended but desirable consequence of medical treatment.” Not the externality effect, “an economic term for the effects of a transaction on parties who did not make the original agreement.” but more the unintended consequences of an action. “An effect that is unforeseen, regardless of type of quality.” What happens when you focus on a goal, be it work, physical, friendship or emotional? Things change and are there unintended side effects?
Does developing new relationships leave less time for the old ones? Does moving countries regularly make you a minimalist? When you take any action, no matter how well thought out, are there always unintended side effects? To stop something, to start something, to change something, to say something does it all have a side effect? Big, little, small, seen, unseen, felt, un-felt, kind or hurtful perhaps are there side effects to all your actions or in-actions? Sometimes I do wonder if true pure lifelong friendship and love without attachment or the bond of family transcends such side effects? Does the vibration of trust and honesty between two people create a space where the only side effect is happiness, acceptance, understanding and joy?
Side effects come in all shapes and sizes. When the power goes out in a city for long periods of time one of the side effects is that 9 months later a baby boom is seen. The power isn’t turned off for these reasons but it is an interesting side effect. There are lots of surprising side effects that we experience over time. Getting sick changes the way you see your body, learning a new language shapes how you interact with a world, losing a loved one changes what you deem to be important. Do side effects from the root cause lead you to paths, you might have never imagined exploring?
Why even how you find yourself reading this blog could be a side effect of looking for something else?
Some people arrive at www.travelwithoastler.com because they are looking to read my odd adventure stories or make sure I am still alive and kicking. However, just as many people find their way here because they are looking for information about something else. There journey here is just a side effect of searching for knowledge about camels, looking to read about arabic or islamic doors, trying to find out about turtles in Oman, or the plant souk in Kuwait. From Googling “dust storms” to ”the highway of death” search engines bring you here as a part of your search. With a click of a mouse you decide how long this side effect will last.
If there are side effects to all actions I think I have given up trying to manage them, instead choosing to be mindful of what is on a fundamental level most important: health, family, true friendship, love, God and lots and lots of laughter!
PS. Happy 60th Birthday MOM!!!!!
Our Thoughts
This came into my life today. Enjoy!
Fear…the fear that paralyzes, begins with a thought.
Hatred…the hatred that destroys, begins with a thought.
Anger…the anger that damages, begins with a thought.
Apathy…the apathy that defeats, begins with a thought.
Paranoia…the paranoia that devastates, begins with a thought.
Peace…the peace that calms, begins with a thought.
Joy…the joy that brings victory, begins with a thought.
Kindness…the kindness that changes lives, begins with a thought.
Warrior Chicks By Holly Wagnor
Paths
A path, the general form of a filename or of a directory name, specifies a unique location in a file system.
The PATHS (Providing Alternative THinking Strategies) curriculum is a program for educators and counselors that is designed to facilitate the development of self-control, emotional awareness, and interpersonal problem-solving skills.
or
PATH (Port Authority Trans-Hudson) service between New York City and New Jersey.
or
A Garden path sentence is a sentence for which the responder’s most intuitive interpretation is an incorrect one, ultimately luring them into an improper parse. Garden path sentences are used in psycholinguistics to illustrate that, while reading, human beings process language one word at a time. The “garden path” is a reference to the saying “to be led up the garden path”, meaning “to be misled”.
or
or perhaps you are simple talking about the path you decide to walk everyday.
Regardless of the type of path you are talking about they all lead you somewhere. Everyone has and is on their own path. I have been trying for the last three weeks to walk a new path to places. When I leave my apartment, when I leave my classroom, when I go out shopping. I have been trying to walk different ways even though I am heading to a familiar place. New paths bring you new experiences. You see new things and meet new people. There is something comforting about old paths but truth be told, like old files that should be deleted, old paths. like old conflicts, don’t need to be embraced. You remember the old paths, learn from the old paths but sometimes it is best just to let go and move forward on a new path. The small little changes you make with your feet sometimes really do help to provide an alternative thinking strategy.
This summer in New York we rode the PATH train. This PATH brought us many new and interesting places. The PATH was quick and efficient and helped us enjoy the New York traffic as a tourist photo opportunity instead of seeing it as something delaying our path to fun.
Enjoying your path somedays takes work and somedays your path is filled with simple morning hellos, beauty and new experiences. For me the goal is to find a balance between planning my path and surrendering to embrace my path, where ever it takes me, where ever it leads me and whatever happens to be on my path that day!
“You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself in any direction you choose. You’re on your own.
And you know what you know. You are the guy who’ll decide where to go.”
-Dr. Seuss-
An Ugly Word
It is late here. I woke-up thinking about an ugly word. Perhaps it is just the homesickness that woke me up, maybe it is the fact that I really do need an alarm clock, that isn’t my telephone, so late next text messages don’t wake me up or is possible for one word to float around your brain and cause you to get up in the middle of the night. Pretty words like delightful, peaceful, compassion and kindness help you sleep. Like the comfort I get from seeing each of my fridge magnets, sweet words bring you a sense of calm.
Tonight I woke-up thinking about the nasty word, disingenuous.
Disingenuous
adj.1. Not straightforward or candid; insincere or calculating: “an ambitious, disingenuous, philistine, and hypocritical operator, who … exemplified … the most disagreeable traits of his time” (David Cannadine).2. Pretending to be unaware or unsophisticated; faux-naïf.3. Usage Problem Unaware or uninformed; naive.
A word that represents such an ugly trait. I mean how do you know if people are being disingenuous? It would be nice if some alarm sounded or you were handed a red flag every time you met someone who was going to be disingenuous but sadly that isn’t the case. So as you travel how do you deal with or protect yourself from the disingenuous without shutting out the truly genuine and beautiful people?
I guess you ask questions, you listen, you hope, you pray and if you trust the wrong people every once and a while you just deal with it and try to clean up the mess. Maybe or maybe not. Clearly I don’t have the answer for this as it is almost midnight and I am still pondering this frightful word.
“Fear is temporary. Regret is forever.”
ترجمة عربية.
Strong Women
Strong woman of any religion, race or age inspire me. Whether 4, 17, 35 or 65 being able to stay humble and strong at the same time is truly a gift. Watch a put together women balance home, husband, career and her personal life is truly an amazing feet. Some make it seem so effortless, smiling with a houseful of kids, making pancakes for two families and catching up over coffee with another friend is no easy feet. Strong women juggle jobs and graduate school not because they want to or it is easy but because they know that increased education improves their options. With or without a man as a part of your team a woman’s ability to stay focused on what is important is truly amazing!
I have often been asked about women and their rights in the Middle East. The topic is complex but in watching several strong Arab women it is interesting to see how they use their power silently and gracefully. The women who is quiet and knows when to walk away may hold more power in her look and smile then an outside observer would ever first realize.
This week we went to the skate park on the corniche, just down from Marina Mall. It was amazing to watch an 18 year old Kuwaiti girl skating with a group of Arab boys. Her pink tights shining she tossed her head back and held her own. It isn’t always easy to deal with a large group of men enjoying a sport but this strong young lady put her long black hair under her helmet and simply followed her passion.
International traveling and teaching can be a challenge. Sometimes you don’t know who to trust or who to turn to for help. It is amazing to watch strong women work together to support each other in foreign lands. Knowing who you are, what your passions are keeps you grounded. From buying new canvass to only eating raw foods strong women know what helps them to stay strong!
Odd Writing Routine
“The art of art, the glory of expression, and the sunshine of the light of letters, is simplicity.”
-Walt Whitman-
Somedays I write badly and other days not as badly. I didn’t always want to be a writer. When I was 11 I wanted to be a lawyer. When I was 12 I bought a T-shirt that listed the ways you could change the world. Being a writer was one of the ways. I fell in love with the idea that words could inspire, motivate, anger, help a person or a situation. Sure there is a small thrill when you see you name in print but if blogging has taught me anything it is that writing joy comes from figuring out how “A” plus “B” can go together to equal a whole new “C’.
People read what is written for just as many reasons as an author feels compelled to share their words. Some authors write with a stunning level of personal honesty. Like train-wreck honesty, you read because you are amazed at the sheer level of raw emotion put on the page.
I try not to think very much about the process of writing, about who is reading or what there thinking. It makes me smile when someone uses a blog line back to me but I often try to ignore it. Wishing instead that they would just ask me over for tea so we could talk about there world and life because what my readers do and think tends to inspire me.
I am getting better at carrying around a pen and paper so when the inspiration to write happens I am at least prepare for the process. Last week I forgot my journal and found myself stringing sentences together in between the printed font of a flyer. My friends know better then to walk behind me in the mall, whel I start writing down my ramblings. They just walk around and shake their head as they say, ” Hazards of shopping with a writer.”
There are days when the words float around in the air. Sometimes I manage to catch them and put them onto paper. Other days I file them away for a middle eastern Friday morning and sometimes I just enjoy the perfect poetry as it skypes or glides past. Leaving me inspired to write another day.
Words are wonderful!
“Most of the writers I know have somehow managed to stay in touch with that inner child who’s never heard of such a thing as an internal editor.”
-Joann Ross-
So today, when I have a natural instinct to keep something a secret, I think to myself, “Why? Why don’t I want people to know?” Because if I am living an honest life, and my eyes are open, and I’m trying my hardest to be good and kind, then anything I’m doing is fine to tell people.
That’s why I can write about what I write about on this blog.
And when you think you cannot tell someone something about yourself, ask yourself, “Really, why not?”
Get Over Yourself!
A wise man once, okay perhaps more than once, said to me,” Get over yourself!” He’d say these words and I’d smile. First of all because I am a blogger. Who is kidding who on some level to have the luxury or take the time to sit and randomly write the thoughts that come into your head is a pretty all about me thing to do. However, I enjoy the phrase, “Get over yourself because removing the “ego” is a powerful way to focus on solutions and on problem solving.
I’ve been people watching lately and it has been very interesting to watch how people handle stress. It is quite shocking how two people can experience the exact same set of circumstances but the person with the lack of ego or who is truly over them self is able to display compassion, empathy, flexibility and understanding. Someone who is so focused on the bigger picture isn’t thinking about them but rather what is best for the greater community or team.
Dealing with big egos, consistent and repetitive questions and people who truly believe your world should stop because they walked in the room is a challenge. Somedays (and with some people) it is more of a challenge then you signed up for but perhaps as we work to find ways to get over ourselves we can also work to find a gentle way to help those high maintenace people realize that this really isn’t all about them.
This post, this problem, this situation, this solution is about what needed to be said, fixed, examined or addressed, it isn’t about you. So because I can’t always say this let me say it now, “Get over yourself!”
Ways to Get Over Yourself
Shift your perspective. When disappointed, ask yourself, “How much will this matter in five years?” Give yourself credit for choosing and acting,
whether or not the short term results of your choices work out.
Every choice–even a poor one is a platform for learning.Remember, you are *playing* a bigger *game*.
When it stops feeling playful it is time to fly a kite! (Yes, literally.)Treat yourself like a valued employee. Take regular breaks in the day, week and month. Ask for help early and often. The sooner you get over believing you have to do it all yourself, the sooner you will get over believing you have to be perfect. Let every error be the opportunity for swift, gracious correction. It is not nearly as important to be perfect as it is to be at ease with recognizing and correcting errors. When you catch yourself dramatizing your problems, lean into it. Give yourself five minutes to get truly melodramatic, or to tell you tale of woe and intrigue as a stand-up comedy act.
“You think you have computer problems? Well let me tell you!.”Shift perspective (in the other direction). When you find yourself disaster planning–running your current difficulties out to their most horrific possible conclusions. Stop! Check! Are you breathing? (Well, then take a breath.) Is their peanut butter in your refrigerator? Are you okay in this very moment? Let that be enough, moment to moment, until your gremlins back off. Cultivate a spiritual life. The very best way to get over yourself is to have an abiding awareness that there is a power greater than yourself. How you cultivate and practice this awareness is up to you, and it is indispensable for sanity in business.
You You may reprint or copy or distribute The New Leaf ™ provided this copyright notice and a link to http://www.mollygordon.com is included. Copyright (c) Shaboom, Inc.™ 2002. All rights reserved
U.S. Library of Congress ISSN: 1530-311X.
Kuwait City, KUWAIT
Christine Oastler is a freelance travel writer, teacher and artist, currently living in Mahboula, Kuwait. Born and raised in Kingston, Ontario, Canada, Christine obtained her Bachelor of Arts at Trent University and her Bachelor of Education from Queen’s University. Currently traveling around the Middle East she finds herself riding the odd camel and embracing a new culture!